Saturday, March 03, 2007

The correct way to beat your wife and still make it to heaven

A Bahraini cleric weighs in on the correct way to beat your wife as per the Koran and still have Allah favor you on the Day of Judgement.

The highlights:

1. Never in front of the children
2. No bleeding
3. No broken bones
4. Never on her face or sensitive parts

The actual verse from the Koran that gives him the religious authority to say this:

The Noble Qur'an - An-Nisaa 4:34 - Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women on whose part you see ill­conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh isEver Most High, Most Great.

Of course the Bible is no better. A careful reading of the Old Testament has numerous instances where noble men of the Bible beat their wives. Job for example beat her with a bundle of reeds when she offended him. Jehovah apparently didnt think it was a big deal.


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